It was actually only 5 days after that that we got the call about meeting with Maria, and two weeks after that we took Mina home.
This birth mother had just heard that Geoff and I had adopted and she called to congratulate us, apologizing that she hadn't chosen us, telling me she had been thinking about me a lot ever since she made her decision. What an amazing woman! She herself was going through a difficult time of decision making in her life and yet she was thinking about me, not wanting to hurt Geoff and I, and wishing that it could have been us, but knowing she couldn't deny the spirit. She has a great relationship with the adoptive parents of her daughter and sounded very happy on the phone, stating that the adoption process had turned out to be one of the best experiences of her life. It was great talking to her and being blessed by her amazing character.
Maria also called today and it was great talking to her. She is also an amazing woman, doing a great job raising her other children, maintaining her positive and happy nature. I feel so blessed that she picked us and that she has become such a good friend. I can see God's hand in this work more and more every day. God knew that Mina was meant to come to us and if the first birth mother had picked us we would not have been able to adopt Mina. Maria felt a connection with us just by looking at our picture and we all felt that connection when we met. It only took Maria two days to decide that she was serious about adoption and that we were the couple to adopt her child.
Geoff and I recently listened to a program on NPR about abortion and one of the Dr's on the show mentioned that women who choose abortion are actually unselfish because they realize they would be unable to care for a child. I couldn't believe what I was hearing, especially after being involved in the adoption process and having met birth mothers who had made the decision that really was unselfish. Birth mothers, too, realize that they would be unable to care for a child, but proceed with the pregnancy and give life to a child as a gift for someone else. Not much comes closer to the atonement of Christ, giving a life while putting their own life in danger, literally, to do so.
I found this poem about birth mothers and would like to share. Geoff and I are in awe of these amazing women.
by Leslie Gallimore of Charlotte Pregnancy Center *as published in the July 2004 BirthMom Buds Bulletin
B is for the bravery of putting your child first
I is for the interest you have in your child
R is for remaining true to what you believed is best
T is for the tears you shed
H is for the hours you spend pondering adoption
M is for the months you were pregnant
O is for the overwhelming and mixed emotions
T is for the terrific woman you are
H is for the honor you deserve
E is for the experience of labor
R is for the reward of choosing life
Geoff and I want to honor all birth mothers and encourage everyone to do the same, especially during this month celebrating adoption. Let's celebrate birth mothers and the miraculous decision they have made.